So my wife left me yesterday. I am very sad but I know she had to. I feel horrible for her. I miss her and wish that I could have been better. With or without her I know that I have to figure out why I could have hit her.The strange thing is that I usually try to live a calm and peaceful life. Without the fights that inevitably ended in my overstepping boundaries, I felt we were happy. Ultimately when it ended that way, I would feel like a horrible person; that it was something wrong with me and that “I will never let it happen again”Life has been tough lately for both of us. Being out of work for over 6 months and no unemployment has been stressful for both of us. She looked for work. I looked for work. Nothing. I finally found something but haven’t been paid yet after working for over 2 months.When I read some of the things about “abusers” I see a pattern that generalizes some traits as if they are intentional. I hate to consider that many of those were things that I did to Her, but I don’t really know. I have always respected her opinions. I have always expected her feedback. She made me a better person. How could I treat someone that is so special to me in this way?So what I am left to figure out is: Am I the person who is a Serial Abuser? Can I fix me? I can’t find any resources out there to for people. I want to be a better person and I don’t know how to get there.Any thoughts are welcome and deserved.