Thanks to both of you for your advice. I do get angry about all this, and I realized a while back that I need to be angry in order to move forward. I’m talking about the kind of anger that pushes one to make changes, not the anger that makes one resort to violence. There’s a great book I read a long time ago during another rough period in my life that helped me find some degree of inner peace and some insight into detachment. It’s called “The Tibetan Book Of Living And Dying” by Sogyal Rinpoche, a renowned Buddhist. Not light reading by any means, but it’s a powerful book.Prior to my son’s diagnosis, I felt that his behavior was largely due to my wife’s stress level. I’ve also seen my daughter mirror some of her mother’s behavior, such as stomping through the house and slamming doors. I’ve also noticed how her reflux problems seem to disappear when she gets on the bus, and reappear when she gets home. I was off from both jobs over Thanksgiving, and I noticed that she complained of symptoms much less when I was home.This all concerns me, and I worry about what goes on when I’m not home. This causes blowups with my wife, as she takes it as me accusing her of being a bad parent. Everything casues blowups with her. She just called me at work 10 minutes ago, angry that there was no snow brush in the car. She’s been driving that car for a week and a half, but it’s my fault that there’s no f-ing snow brush. You’ve all been there, I know. My plan as it stands is to just make it through Christmas. I was able to find an agency that claims to provide assistance for anyone regardless of gender, age, etc., and I will try to sneak out there next week when I have to go downtown for work-related stuff. I’ve been planning – making lists and checking them twice (it’s Christmas, after all!), and gathering as many vital records as I can.I’m trying to make copies of as many documents as I can find – birth certificates, tax returns, etc. I don’t know where she puts a lot of this stuff, so it’s been a challenge. If worse comes to worse and I have to make a quick exit, I have a list of basic things to pack for me and the kids.The lawyer I spoke with yesterday gave me the name and number of someone else who specializes in divorce, and I found a number and website for another one.I’ve also reconnected via email with one of my best friends. I have to communicate through my work email, and do all my research and planning here as well for obvious reasons. My wife is on to me, and has said so a few times, so I guess the clock is ticking… I can’t thank you guys enough! Nothing either of you has said has been offensive or overstepped any boundaries. I think maybe I’m in denial about being in denial about the demise of my marriage? New and Improved Superdenial?